he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
