He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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