I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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