Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
