tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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