so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
