You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
