I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
