Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
