Just cropdusted the office
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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