halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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