He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
