Do you still have your period?
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Randomize
