It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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