He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
