We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Randomize