it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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