you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
