dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
