So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
