but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize
