Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize