There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
