you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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