i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
