roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
