This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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