I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Text me some of your sweat
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
