im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
This house was built for laser tag.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
