just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
