I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I AM VODKA MAN
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
i think im in europe. pls send help
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize