so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
