Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize