I smell stomach acid.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
