Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
