I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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