Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
