all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
they need to just BURY HIM!
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize