There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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