I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
