I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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