So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
