It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize