What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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