dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
This girl is more easily done than said...
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
