forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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