Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Randomize