We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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