I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
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