can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
We got so high we made milksteak
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
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