.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
